|Posted on 29 October, 2019 at 10:55|
Lust and loneliness can pretty much feel like love when the timing's right. But are they enough to sustain a long-term commitment like marriage and kids?
Even with this throw-away lifestyle that we have, I don't believe people get into serious relationships with the mindset of getting out of it in a few years if it doesn't work out. We don't deliberately set ourselves up for future pain; we commit to our partners with the concept of "forever" in our hearts.
The problem is, however, that sometimes we commit for the wrong reason and therefore, ultimately, to the wrong person. And the damage this can cause to our mental well-being is huge.
But, thankfully, not irreparable.
Red flags don't disappear on receipt of a marriage proposal or the signing of a mortgage or lease. And I'm not talking about the red flags your partner is waving. I'm talking about the ones that are fluttering inside of YOU. The nagging feeling you have that this isn't the love story you're pretending it is or the one you deserve. If there's any other narrative going on inside of you, like "this is my last chance", or "it will get better", maybe take some time out to reflect on whether you're in this for the right reason. Is it love, lust or loneliness for you?
Or something else?