LIFE AND RELATIONSHIP COACH

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Theresa Fearon, Life and Relationship Coach

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THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS AN ACCIDENTAL FLING. 5 WAYS TO AVOID AN XMAS F**K UP!

Posted on 1 December, 2019 at 0:40

We are fast approaching the festive season when the focus on enjoyment goes up and boundaries come down.  Office parties, Christmas drinks, end of year team-building - if it involves alcohol and the suggestion "to let your hair down", good behaviour can be compromised.


You don't have to be a kill-joy to keep your relationship intact.  You just have to be self-aware and honest.  With yourself.  If you have to remind yourself that you're in a relationship to keep your hands of the girl in accounts, or the guy in HR, your relationship is in danger.


There are some actions you can take beforehand, to ensure that you don't end up losing your relationship over a drunken meaningless fling.


 

  1. Eat properly.  Don't skip meals before the event so you can fit into your chosen outfit.  Alcohol and an empty stomach don't go well together.  Drink plenty of water throughout the day to hydrate and balance your alcohol intake during the evening with water.
  2. Be honest with yourself.  Stop pretending that bit of harmless flirtatation is harmless.  It's not.  It could cost you your relationship, the respect of others, your family and even your job.  Really, is 15 mins of reckless fun worth all of that?
  3. Stay away from the "object of your desire".  And if he/she wants to have a quiet "chat" to find out why, you know that you've done the right thing. They have probably been thinking about what could happen too.  It may feel like a missed opportunity, or it could be you dodged a bullet.  It depends on how much you value your relationship and your integrity.
  4. Invite your partner.  If you your function allows partners and spouses to attend.  And make it about you - as a couple.  Go shopping together, plan it like a date night.  But don't lie - don't tell your partner they can't attend when they can.  Unless you're ashamed of your partner, in which case you don't go either.  It would seem that your relationship needs work - and that's as good a time to start!
  5. If you really are attracted to a colleague at work, and you know you want to use the opportunity of the Season's festivities to make your move to see where this leads, take a long, hard look in the mirror.  Your relaionship is over, my friend.  You've made your decision.  You may not want to hurt your current partner, but betrayal hurts more than honesty.  So deal with it before the betrayal.



Finally, only you know if your honesty and integrity will be tested.  And whether the risk is greater than the reward.

Happy Holidays!

 


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